December 28, 2006

Precious Life

Hello! I am Chong Jia Yee . . . . . .

Jia Yee. . . .you are so C.U.T.E. . . . . . . ! . ! . ! .

come on! don't leave me alone ! please ~
Jia Yee & Jou Nin
SPF50+ Nivea & L'oreal sunblock . . . Yesterday sleep quite late....feels sleepy now!~ lack of zzzz make me feels dizzy but today i sleep till 10am++ i think i'm still in the bed if Alice didn't bring her baby here. (paiseh..!)

I
t's very hot today, i can feel dat the sun now are not the same (maybe the ozone layer is getting thin)~ just standing outside of my house for few minutes and i notice that sweats all over my body, makes me feels sticky~ i hate it! wat can i do? i can't change this ... we don't hv four seasons here. Arhh~ miss the time when i was in Canada so so so.. muchy ~ it's so cold and snowing at the time i was there but no choice~ i just stayed there for one week ~it's too short LoL~ what to do, haih!~ unless i migrate there LoL~ maybe i can plan for my retirement there, but..I hv to started saving money from now on.. (need a lot of $$$, anyone who want to sponsor me?) LoL~

In Japan, Korea and Taiwan ~ I can see girls there looking so nice with their make-up and fashionable hair-do~ Their make-up can lasted from morning till night or even the next day, still can go out without taking bath LoL~ Over here, our make-up start melts before we reach the place we goin..haha!~ getting into the that car parked under the sun is like getting into the hot oven, huh~ everything's melting~ Use sunblocks SPF50+ for max protection. I found the brand i'm using now is good ~ (pls. refer to the pix). After that much nonsense i wrote let me con't with my Blog ~ here it goes . . . . .

Today, help Alice to look after Jia Yi while she brings Zhen to Bangkok with Kien, papa & Xen. I hope they will get the way to cure Zhen. First time bathing baby again after 5 yrs ^.^ LoL~ well, i almost forget how to hold the tiny little baby when bathing them~ haha~ but i get back all the memories very fast... i had a good time bathing her....and she seems like very enjoy it too or i should said we both are enjoying the moment LoL~ Her tiny little fingers reminds me of my 3 kids when they are baby & now it's imposibble for me to get to touch their tiny finger again but when i touched Jia Yi's fingers she hold me tight...just like that kind of feelings ^.^ She is a good baby...after bath she played for a while then sleep~


J
ia Yi didnt bring any troubles at all but, in return i was afraid that my kids will injured her. They never hv a baby at home before ^.^ for them, this is the first time get closer to a baby~ I can see they like Jia Yi very much ~ holding her hand, talking to her and looked after her. Both of my princess were so helpful when i ask them to help me~ They like the baby so much.. all of them has grown up now with Xinnin already 5 yrs old ~(Can't imagine how times flies?? ... my memory is still fresh when i first born KaiXen~ )

Deep in my heart i knows that my kids wanted a little bro or sister ~ but, do i need to be pregnant with another baby for them? This is very difficult decision for me. I can't explain my feeling towards Boon. He oftens hurts me in silence which he didn't even notice it. We have nothing to talk about ~ dunno when it starts~ how long can we stayed like that?? I hv tried to bring this issue to him several times in which he promise me he will changed but to no veil. He never changed!! and.., i don't expect he can change just for me~

His drinking habit is killing me too~ it's like a sharp knife stabbed into my heart which keep on bleeding day by day~ just hv to wait till the day i stopped bleeding and i will take my last breath and gone forever. No one will see me again! No use for me to changed him. We are peoples from different world but, staying under one roof. We don't have any similarities at all.... i don't drink, i don't gambling, i don't going out late night, i don't put all my times outside with my friends, having a good time outside and forgetting the one at home. Should I have to change myself to match him???

Why?...
why do i hv to be the first one to talk to him everyday which i might not get a response? why do i hv to be the one start worried when he doesn't come back from work? why do i hv to be the one who call him all the time and don't even hv me in his heart? why do i hv to the one who ask him what he want to eat and he don't even feels hungry? why do i hv to be the one who worried about his health that he never cares about it? why do i hv to be the one who called him at 4am to ask his location and he don't even think it's bedtime? why do i hv to care so much for him but he doesn't care for me at all? why do i hv to worried so much for him when he thinks there is no big deal? why do i hv to care for his feelings all the time when he don't even care how i feels??. . .

L
astly....i wonder is love still exist??? I am finding my love....i am a human being with emotions, i need someone to talk to, someone close to me who else if not u?? I need someone listens to my feelings, happy one, sad one, suprises i get, my new experiences, my complaint, problems i faces and my needs... but, i don't have one who can share all this... i wanted to share my life with u maybe just once (is there any future life??)~ Life is too short and I wonder how many more 10 years we can be together?? We have finished our first ten years together without leaving much sweet memories beside for u to give me 3 lovely kids. Thank U~

F
or me, they are my life, they are my everything~ they brings laughter to me, they brings angers to me, they bring worried to me, they bring hopes to me, they brings surprises to me, they help me grown more mature, help me to move on my life, accompany me all the time, makes my life more meaningful and add colours to it~ Thanks, mommy loves u all so so much~ I can't imagine the life i hv without having 3 of them in this world.

I
am not that bad, at least i am living my day without the feeling of emptiness...i still hv my parents to help me out, i hv my brother coming visit me, i hv Aeiween to chat and share my up and downs, i really enjoy chatting with her, i hv a lovely mom-in-law that care for everthing happening around her, i hv a good father in law, i hv a lot of caring friends out there to chat with and owned all the thing i want. Not lack of food and clothes. Having my own car and a peaceful home to live in. Thanks~

I do believe in FATE. It has been fate that brought Boon and me together. It's fate that i come to this world and meet all the people around me. My family, my friends, my pets ~ we are lucky that in this big world with so many people and animals lived in and we are fated to meet and knowing each other for once in our life time to share the same life journey. This moment will not be replaced or repeated~ I appeciate and treasure all the people besides me so much. Without any one of you, my life will not be the same as now. I enjoyed the moment we shared and being together always. We can't predict things that going to happen tomorrow. Anything will happens to us and our loved one which might left us regrets forever.~ Why don't you treasure them while you still hv the opportunity to do it now??. Remember this quotes
"TIME AND TIDE WAIT FOR NO MAN"

Help me to find back my loving and caring husband that i know 10 yrs ago. . .

I want to say "I Love U" to all of you before it's too late. Take care ~

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